this makes me happy

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Beat the slump

"Appreciate what you have now and you'll probably discover that the grass isn't always greener." -From the Don't Sweat the Small Stuff box calender

I am in a funk today, a real slump. Some of it is because I'm tired, some because I am the PMS monster, some because I am a little overwhelmed by all of life. I wouldn't usually write on these type of days, (I don't want the pity that is inevitable in complaining, and I don't like the sound of me complaining) but I had to to tell you what happened. I haven't posted in a week and was googling tips on how to feel happy, and just in reading them and deciding that I wanted to feel better...it worked! Now I am not like, jumping up and down singing on the mountain top happy; but my mood has shifted. I feel like it is not so unmanageable now, where 10 minutes ago I just wanted to go crawl back into bed and wait for tomorrow.

The quote from my new calender at the top of the page helped a lot, I googled "how to feel happy" and read a few of the things I found (links at the bottom) and went for a walk to the building next door (same company) for a coffee drink. I am only gonna drink part of it probably, because I had a fruit and yogurt parfait from McDonald's for breakfast. I am trying to avoid as much sugar as possible right now in the attempt to eat healthier. But that little jolt of caffeine helps, the walk help elevate my blood pressure a little, and the quote and links help me realize (once again...because it always takes longer than you think it will to change your frame of mind) that my life ain't so freaking bad!

Be-Confident -This is a Wiki-how, and I know some people have a problem with Wikipedia because it is written by regular people and not professionals. But I like it, so there.

Cultivating a positive attitude - I just found this blog while searching for this post, and I love it! I love his example about the fighting monkeys, it makes so much sense!

~Sydney

Get a hobby!

Do you ever feel like doing nothing?

Getting off of work, out of school, or away from the corner you beg for change at, and want to just curl up in a ball in front of the T.V.?

Do you have a hobby?

Something you enjoy doing at your leisure, like dance, cooking, or reading?

If you only said yes to the first question, I would highly recommend doing something about the second.

My hobbies are what I am thankful for today, because they get me outside of my head. The thoughts in our heads are not always rational, or are sometimes caused by emotions. This is where they can snowball into depression, panic attacks, and all kinds of other icky-ness. We use our rational thinking to decide whether these thoughts are valid, then act accordingly. But there are times when the rational thinking doesn't work right, or there is no time for it, or you are overwhelmed with the situation at hand. Things you have to do are accomplished on complete auto-pilot while our brains work away at what's really bothering us. Many people then wildly exaggerate how bad or imposable a situation is when they try to get a hold of it by preparing for the worst.

"I'll just tell the boss that I missed Fed-Ex cut off time, and uber-huge, mega-important

client's tapes are still sitting on the counter. He'll get mad and yell, I'll get written up

and it'll be fine. Worst case scenario. I can totally handle this, what's a little yelling?"

Gets added onto and added onto until you're thinking:

"But then what if uber-huge, mega-important client convinces the boss to fire me? What if I go home and tell the domestic partner and he-she leaves me? What if I don't get another job and can't pay the rent? Then I become all homeless and smelly and I never have sex again!"

EEEEKKK!

Before you know it you have a head ache, your all grumpy, and you've spent up all your concentration on things that are unlikely to occur.

Don't panic! This is where your hobby comes in!

Pick up your guitar, open that book, or bust out that dance move and watch as the frustration melts. Because now you have something else to be frustrated about!

Seriously, that is why it works; you re-direct your thinking. You direct it to something you enjoy, even if you don't enjoy it right then. And the first problem goes away. Get lost in it and really try to concentrate on what you are doing now. Focus. Give your self about a half hour if you're crunched for time, if you have an hour though-all the better!

Then, go back to that crisis. Keep your head in the hobby place for a moment and get a grip. What you really don't want to do right now is recall that anxious feeling that went with the problem you were trying to work out. Keep calm, breath, work it out. It will be much easier now I bet to find an answer that really works.

~Sydney

Change your mind, change your life

Happy New Year!
Welcome 2009, you couldn't have gotten here sooner!

I don't have a lot of time right now, it's my first day back at work and I need to file...(oh for joy! blah) but in an effort to surround myself with good advice and sound ways of thinking for the new year, I bought Don't Sweat the Small Stuff Box Calendar. Based off the book by the same name that has become so popular. Today I am gonna give you a little peak, the first 5 pages have a theme, and it so totally clicks with the way I am re-working my thinking!

Jan. 1
"Just like a garden that flourishes best under certain conditions, your home operates more smoothly when the emotional climate is well thought out"

Jan. 2
"The creation of an emotional climate has more to do with your inner preferences than your external environment. Try to keep unnecessary rushing around to a minimum."

Jan. 3
"Give yourself an extra ten minutes to get yourself and your family to your appointments"

Jan. 4
"When your done with one activity, leave a little earlier for the next one. Try to schedule your activities, work, play, and everything else a little further apart"

Jan. 5
"You may indeed be a very busy person, but remember that filling your head with thoughts of how overwhelmed you are only exacerbates the problem by making you feel even more stressed than you already do."

Some of it is just common sense, and it all seems so simple. But how many of us overlook the simplest things because we are living in our own head?

~Sydney

Hollydaze

photo:here

Hello all my lovelies!


How was your Solstice/Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Ramadan/Santa Lucia/Yule?


I can't believe how fast the time flew by, but isn't that always the complaint? Time always flies by when your having a good time. I had a 4 day break for Christmas, and am now off work for my 5 day break for New Years! I have had a ball, for the first time in a long time. So much of it is due to the simple shift change this blog inspired. I am kinda blown away by the fact that just looking for the good part of everyday, has helped relax enjoy so much more. I'm sure the back to back mini vacations don't hurt either though!

I had a wonderful Solstice on Dockweiler beach with The Man*, had a nice bonfire, some food & drink, and watched the sunset. He took a little nap and I meditated the whole time, about and hour and a half! It was such an awesome break, if you have the chance to do a little focused breathing by the sea I would say go do it.


Christmas was wonderful, for the first time in years. This blew my mind, Xmas has always had some sort of stress monster chasing it around and this year was so much more pleasant.


And now, I am about to run out to San Francisco to see Les Claypool and Dweezil Zappa (heading up Zappa Plays Zappa) for New Years! Swoon!


I also got off my butt and did something of a photo shoot, even though the lighting kinda sucked. I am saving for a good piece of lightning equipment, till then I have flood bulbs and tin foil. It really turned out way better than I thought. So then I submitted a sample portfolio to the Hearst 8x10 Photography Biennial! Yes I really did, no more slacker-ness for me you hear!

I am doing this with list making. I am a write-absolutely-everything- down convert. Lists rule!

I will be back to send in all the details of NYE and the trip up north later, till then fill me in on your holidays. What did you get into?

~ Syd








*(forgot to mention that The Man is called this because he prefers to remain a wing man on my adventures through cyber spacey land, there will never be any reference to his real name or any photographs posted. It would be rockin if those of you that know him in "real" life respect this.)

Flood

Second song that makes me feel better. This is labeled on YouTube as the "original version", I don't know if that's true because the guy that seems to be singing is out of sink. There is another on there that has had the embed disabled, and I think that one is the official video.
Anyway! I remember this song from way back when on KROQ, then The Man played it in the car!

I am not really a religious person, and this band is christian...but I like it anyway...and this was supposed to be a quick post, so I'm done explaining myself already!

Less Stress

Hello again!

Wow how the time has gotten away from me, I can't believe it has been a week! It's Christmas time though and everyone is a little more distracted right now. I am making it good distractions though, deciding to live and enjoy the present moment.

I saw the doctor again on Friday, for a follow up on last months appointment. She says I still seem tense, and wants me to consider going back on anxiety meds. Lexapro to be exact. I took Lexapro for a long time, to the point I didn't think it was doing anything for me anymore. I was sick of rushing all the way across town for a silly little pill that was supposed to help even out my mood. No one was teaching me to make permanent changes to my mindset, they were just handing me pills. So it had to be stopped, and after tapering the dose down for about a month, it did.

I felt as though the window of my mind had been wiped clean, I felt, clearer. I was also just a little on edge, and didn't really have time for it. I jump the gun and get emotional before it's called for. Or assume the worst and freak. And so yeah, I'm on edge. But I hate having to rely on anything on a daily basis to make me feel normal. It sucks. I'm not talking about like, food and water.

So I am on a mission. A mission to re-learn how to deal with stress.
To be honest, I never learned this in the first place, both my parents are really really bad at it. My mother just lived her life in complete fear, she did very little and none of what she did was in accordance with her dreams of what life should be. She was also very swayed by what others thought of her. I have seen this in me too, if someone disapproves I will change my way of thinking and that is very far from right. If I think it won't work, or I have to talk to too many people I will re-think what I want to do. Gotta get over it!

So, #1 is living without fear.

To be continued.....!